-The love, hate relationship-
I Fought for this on nights I can’t count,
counted on this to carry me, and
meaning . In the background we I found
a meaning hiding between hopes for
a 9-5 and bonds that traveled
with me far after my feet walked
this campus. Made friends
as sleep and I became strangers.
Stretching the weary body and mind
by keeping in mind that this paper
would create paths to unknown success;
instead I hid you far away from the eye
in embarrassment for the difference
in what I thought you embodied
and what I should have discovered myself.
Over the years this become my mirror
how should I view you, what light should
I see you in?
Questions still linger three years after
I conquered you.
Many honor you, but I have my own views.
Despite the outcome it’s all in vanity
to continue the monotonous repetitions of how come,
how could I blame you for a distorted
expectation I created?
While I haven’t success materialize
I still hold those late nights close
when we were closest to being
immune to stress.
I still find it strange that on nights like these
I find myself at peace when my mind
reverts back to those late nights and early mornings.
Thankful, if not for anything else
at least for the memories of
feeling free, and ironically
the unfamiliar faces eventually became
the closest thing to a distant memory.